We have a cool mechanical gadget. We got it just over two years ago, and I love it. It’s a video camera that records onto mini dvd’s. The reason I love it so much? The discs can go straight from the camera to our dvd player. Instant entertainment for my kids. They love to watch themselves, especially videos of themselves when they were younger. They would rather watch these videos than any of the movies they have.
It’s amazing the little things you forget about your babies. For instance, I had completely forgotten that Ryley sounded like a southerner, especially when he would tell you how old he was. Four came out as “fo-wah”. So cute. And I had forgotten how Grace had those cute little chubby toddler thighs. I had forgotten just how shocking Grace’s haircut was in person. The weirdest thing is that Ethan is now as old as Grace was when Ethan was born. AAAAHHHH!!! Where does it all go?
Ethan was the easiest baby. He was always so happy, so even-tempered. He was very active once he learned how to crawl and such, but just such a happy, easy baby. I’m really missing those days right now. Someone or something came along during the night and snatched my sweet, easy, even-tempered precious baby boy, and replaced him with a cranky, into-everything, often mean, very defiant toddler. He is terrorizing his brother and sister on a regular basis. It is kind of amusing at times to see a 5 and 6 year old RUNNING away from my two year old, but then I”ll see whatever it is that he has in his hands that he’s attempting to throw at them (thus the reason for running!), and it’s less funny. He’s at the age where everything becomes a weapon apparently. His favorite “weapons” of choice right now are his Thomas train cars, and Lincoln Logs. He won’t sit on timeout to safe my life. He wants to be constantly entertained. A couple of times a week now, he refuses to take a nap.
I do occasionally see glimpses of the sweet baby I used to have. Ethan still says “nigh-night, sleep tight, yuh-yu (love you)” when I put him to bed. He still likes to snuggle to read books before bed every night. He has the sweetest smile and loves to “help” me do things. He loves animals and trains, and anything he can take apart, so as long as I have any of those with me, I’m good.
Watching the videos last night just made me kind of sad. We’re done with babies. And my babies are so quickly growing up. Ethan will start preschool in January (cross fingers and toes that the potty training goes well by then!), and before I know it, he wil be headed off to kindergarten too. Would I do it all again? In a heartbeat. If my husband told me today “Let’s have one more”, I would jump at the chance. But then, I don’t know that this feeling of wanting and needing to mother a baby would ever leave, whether I had one child or ten. But oh how I miss those baby days sometimes…..even the midnight feedings when you’re barely awake and it’s so dark and quiet; the “slug phase” where they can’t do anything but be held and stare into your eyes…..I miss my babies being babies. I want to hold onto all those memories of how they talked, how they looked, what they liked, special things they did, and never let that go.