When Ethan was little, he used to sing in the car all the time. I’m a car/shower/everywhere singer and my kids have inherited the gene. I used to laugh at the lyrics they’d come up with. But it was one of my greatest joys to hear their little voices from the backseat.
It’s been years since I’ve heard Ethan singing along to any songs. At school, he almost always refuses to sing with his class, except for the grade productions at the end of each year. He normally ends up with his fingers in his ears, or his arms crossed and an angry look on his face whenever it’s music time.
In the past few weeks, I’ve noticed something going on in my car. It started with a small, quiet humming along. Then it progressed to him quietly singing along with part of the song. Monday, as we came home from dropping Grace and Ryley at soccer practice, he was totally belting out “Some Nights” by .fun. I nearly had to pull over because I got all choked up and tears were forming in my eyes (pathetic, I know).
I’ve missed him singing in the car. I’ve missed whatever joy kids have inside that allows them to sing. He hasn’t had it. We’ve hit so many dark places with him in the past few years. When we first went to the pediatrician, psychiatrist, and therapist, my biggest heartbreak was that he just did not appear happy at all. Smiles were so very rare, laughter even more rare, and forget singing all together. At therapy Monday when she called me in to chat and update, we talked about how very far he’s come in a year. And he has made tremendous progress. I catch him smiling much more often. Laughter is once again present. And he’s singing!!! Joy of joys…he’s singing!