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My Space

No, I’m not talking about the website. I’m talking about *my* space…my personal area of air, and how it’s slowly disappearing.

I like my space. My husband is not appreciative of that fact as he would love to fall asleep all cuddled together with me. Gah! The kids love to climb into the recliner with me when we’re watching T.V. (which I generally allow because a) I love them dreadfully and b) who knows how much longer they’ll want to be in the same room as me much less occupying the same piece of furniture). The smallest dog wants to sleep right next to my head, the medium dog between me feet, the skinny cat on my chest, and the youngest child in between hubby and myself, typically with his knee in my back and his elbow in my face. I miss my space.

My kids have been aware for the past couple of years that technically, at age 12, they can ride in the front seat of the car. So, given the oldest is 12, and the middle about to turn 12, they frequently call “shot gun” to ride up front. Ugh. I…HATE…IT!!!! I want my space, even in the car. I want some area between me and the five kids (or more) I’m generally running around. Is that awful? I don’t like anyone else pushing the buttons on the touch screen to change the temperature inside the vehicle, nor the song on my iPod, nor the channel on the satellite radio. I don’t have the same desire to see the navigational map with the blue arrow indicating our car up on the screen. But if one of them is in the front passenger seat, that’s generally what happens. And then I feel guilty for getting annoyed.

I remember what a big deal it was to ride in the front seat as a kid. You could see! You felt important riding up there. As someone who easily gets carsick, riding up front is almost a necessity. So I get it. But geez…I want my space! I noticed the other day just how twitchy it makes me to have one of them in the front passenger seat. And it made me feel guilty.

If there’s room in the back, I’ll generally make them sit back there. Safety first, right? It is safer for them to ride in the back – or at least I keep telling myself that. But they have their tricks to get up front….the Princess likes to ride up there after her dance classes so she can turn on the seat heater to loosen the muscles in her legs. The oldest just desperately wants a separation between himself and his younger siblings. He truly believes he’s earned the right as the oldest to always sit up front with me. He probably has. He is currently the only 12-year-old, the only technically legal child of mine allowed up front. He gets this disappointed look on his face when I make him move to the back seats. I can’t help it. I just like my space! I just don’t know how much longer I can keep them in the back seat. Sooner than later, they’ll all be taller than I. Then what? I suppose I’d better get used to it.

One thought on “My Space

  1. It’s as if you’re describing my inner monologue. I feel exactly the same way about my space, although I have learned to compromise on the front seat with my teen in exchange for information/conversation. Otherwise, it’s everybody in the backseat! 🙂

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