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Girls, and Boys

First of all, it’s Friday afternoon. There are less than two hours left in Little Man’s school day. I find myself sitting here, waiting for the phone to ring that he’s gone off the rails again. He’s been back at school since Wednesday, spending the entire time, minus one test, in the resource classroom. Other than one massive meltdown last night, he’s been fine all week. We saw his psychiatrist yesterday. Taking him off the anti-anxiety/anti-depressant med, and putting him on a mood stabilizer at a very low dose. That won’t start until we’re on Spring Break in another ten days. I told him this morning that he will need to eventually be in his own classroom more than not. He calmly nodded his head. He had a good morning today. I had to ride herd to get him through each step of the morning routine, but he was in a good mood and didn’t give any push-back. I must say, I’m exhausted emotionally and physically. I keep praying we’re at the end of this bad spell. There are moments I just can’t help but think we can’t keep on this way.

We had some girl drama with the Princess this week. She came home Wednesday very upset. She started crying, trying to get the words out. A friend of a “friend” had called her something bad on that “friend’s” Instagram page. It took me a bit to puzzle out what was going on and what had happened. What it boiled down to is this “friend” isn’t really a friend, and that the girl drama involving boys – or rather one boy in particular – has begun. At the beginning of the school year, there was a boy who liked the Princess, and she returned the sentiment. Now she’s been told she’s not allowed to date until she’s sixteen, so there was nothing going on between them hanging out at lunch, and sending texts (reviewed by Mom at the end of each day) and Instagrams. After a few weeks, the novelty wore off. She decided she didn’t like the way things were going, and told him she didn’t want to hang out with him anymore. They have remained friends, bonus since they have 7 out of 8 classes together and it would just be awkward if they didn’t get along. Fast forward seven months (SEVEN MONTHS!!) and it turns out this “friend” likes that boy, but he does not return the feeling. And she’s made herself a nuisance to him. Since he doesn’t like her back, she has decided to blame the Princess. I know, I know…but remember how 12 year old female brains work. Yeah – and when you blame a girl for a boy  not liking you, you feel the need to involve other friends who will reinforce that knowledge and start calling that girl bad names. Awesomeness.

I explained to P that when girls get jealous, or feel insecure, they lash out. They have to bring someone else down to lift themselves up. My P is a cute girl. She’s smart. Boys are not a mystery to her so she’s able to talk easily with them. She has it together. I told her when it comes to boys, some girls will flip out and cause all kinds of drama. She’s usually pretty good about rising above it. I think she was pretty shocked, though, that this friend had been talking about her behind her back, and that she’d been called something awful on social media. Reality check, right? I gave her 24 hours to be sad, then told her she had to be done with it. She’s not to let what someone else says affect how she feels about herself. She knows who she is, she knows she has so many amazing qualities. She knows she is NOT what they called her.

She’s better now. She went to dance class on Wednesday and by the time she was back home, she was feeling much better. Dancing and being with her dance friends – who are all awesome girls by the way – helped pick her up. I had lunch with her today, and all was well.  She has this girl’s number and won’t let herself be blindsided again. I ache for her. This isn’t the last time something like this is going to happen. I just hope she holds onto all the things we’ve talked about the last two days. Me? I can’t wait for her middle school years to be over (even though I usually tell myself not to wish time  away), and pray high school is the thousand times better I keep hearing it will be.

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